Shut the Hell Up
by Halpert-fan
Summary: It's cold. It's snowing. There is but one winter tradition that MUST be upheld. Too bad Mugen's just not that kind of person. :MugenxFuu:


**Note from the Author:** This actually started as another story between two different characters from an entirely different show, but after writing a few paragraphs, it just felt a little more like I was writing these guys instead. So...I changed it. But I'm sure you guessed as much. Well, it explains why some of it isn't in perfect character, because it wasn't _them_ to begin with, but it was pretty close- hence the change. Hope you like it!

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own Samurai Champloo or any of the characters, no matter how much I may want to.

* * *

Snow. So pretty until you're standing in it. As poor as she was, Fuu wished more than anything she didn't have to be in this stupid snow. _Why was I excited? _she complained to herself, remembering her enthusiasm at the idea of the first snow of the year. Snow had been long overdue…she just couldn't remember why she wanted it now.

She sneezed loudly, taking in a deep sniff so her hands wouldn't have to leave their spot wrapped tightly in fists beneath her elbows.

"That was disgusting…." the man behind her plainly stated. Fuu spun around, her nose still runny, to shoot a glare at Mugen.

"Oh, shut up," she fought, "You've done worse things than sneeze." _Too many to count, _her mind added.

"I meant the sniff," Mugen told her again, "That was the longest, deepest, grossest thing I've ever heard. Do it again and I swear to God I'll kill you."

"You wouldn't have the guts," Fuu challenged, turning herself more to give her craning neck a break.

"Try me," Mugen shot right back, raising a hand to hold his sword hanging off his back. Suddenly Fuu was distracted.

"Aren't you cold?" she asked, stunned that he could move so freely in the current weather conditions. Mugen shrugged.

"Nah," he brushed off, "I've seen worse." It's not like Fuu hadn't seen worse either. The snow was falling so gently to the ground, how could _anyone_ not have seen worse. If she had been inside, or in that blanket Jin had thought he had seen in the town they had just left cheap enough (and big enough) and gone back to get for the three of them, it would have been a rather pleasant evening. But no. She was stuck in the snow. The cold, cold snow…

"Hey," Mugen gasped, staring ahead in shock. He pointed towards a small clearing a few yards away. Fuu's eyes, droopy with the cold, turned slowly towards the direction he was pointing. She felt her breath catch.

"I-it's…" she stuttered, unable to find the words.

"A house!" Mugen finished, sprinting through the slick ground to reach the door, "And it's empty!" Fuu would have liked to think he was calling back to her, but knowing him, he probably was just declaring that for his own pleasure.

"Waaaaarmth!" Fuu cheered, running through Mugen's abandoned tracks, her arms still tucked tightly around herself. She jumped inside, ready for at least a little relief from the cold, but…

She sneezed again and before she could help herself, she took in another low and long sniff.

"Godammit, woman! I said don't do that!" Mugen yelled, though he didn't reach for his sword as he had promised.

"I can't help it! It's even colder in here than it was out there," Fuu whined, holding herself tighter. Her legs started clambering together, doing twice the shivering to make up for the lack of trembling arms.

"Shit, we can't stay here…" Mugen groaned, trudging out the doorway. Fuu followed after him slowly, taking one last look around the frozen one-room "home." She stopped as her eyes trailed up.

"Wow!" she breathed in excitement, watching her breath form a cloud above her head as she continued to stare, "I've never seen any before!"

"Huh?" Mugen asked, wondering why he was wondering. But something about her odd interest in a stupid, worthless place like this earned a little attention, right?

"Look!" Fuu ordered, not moving her frozen hand to direct his eyes, "Mistletoe! How cool! I've never seen any before!"

"You already said that…" Mugen pointed out, continuing to pout his way far away from the small building.

"Where are you going?" Fuu shouted, though hardly necessary as Mugen hadn't even taken another step from where he had been only a moment before.

"Where do you think? Away from here. Maybe I'll go back to that one town and try to find a place to stay…bet that's what that bastard did. He's probably using that money to eat food, that shithead…"

"Excuse me! I think you're forgetting the significance of such a plant!" Fuu scolded.

"Sure, whatever," Mugen didn't bother to stick around to talk. He started walking away again, but Fuu caught up and grabbed his arm. Tight. It actually kind of hurt. He shot her the darkest, evilest look he could, but she held on.

"Get off me," he ordered.

"No! Not until you obey the laws of the plant!"

"What goddamn laws?!" Fuu let his arm go and Mugen almost made a break for it but he was too horrified of the expression on her face to even hope of moving. Fuu looked…mushy. Like she was trying to be sensitive or something. _Yeah, that'll be the day, _his thoughts laughed.

"Well…" Fuu began innocently, moving her arms around to look more like she was holding herself tenderly, and lifted her shoulder to her cheek. A faint blush crossed her cheeks. _Oh God…she's in love with herself. Probably the only lover she'll ever have._

"When two people our caught under the mistletoes together, they must share…" she sighed, "… a kiss." Mugen started walking away again.

"Well, you have fun with that," he said with a wave.

"Hey! Wait a sec! We were under-" Fuu tried to call back.

"Can't hear you!" Mugen called much louder than needed, trying to exaggerate his distance.

"I know you can! Don't try to mess with me! It's doesn't have to mean anything…! It's just tradition! Oh come on! You're so boring!" Fuu started spouting random insults as she ran to catch up with his steadily increasing pace.

"Boring boring _jerk_! That's what you are! A heartless boring jerk! It won't mean a thing! It never does! It's just what people do!" Mugen wished she would stop adding that part. Maybe he cared a little more than she thought, did she ever think of that?

After a good ten minutes of whining from the shivering girl, Mugen groaned loudly- almost in a scream. He whipped around and grabbed her arm, pulling her lips to his. _Who really cares anyway…_his mind shrugged, keeping his nonchalance as in tact as was humanly possible. For the first time, it was a difficult task to accomplish. Her cold lips…they were so…_Nah, _he shook off.

"There," he said after he pulled away from Fuu, letting her arm go, "Happy now?" He turned around immediately and continued on the path he had been going on.

"I was until you said that…" Fuu breathed in complaint.

"Huh?" Mugen called back, not planning on listening to anything she said after that.

"Nothing, let's just go," Fuu ordered, walking faster. Her arms returned to their first position- wrapped in a death grip around her body. The two were silent for a few more yards.

"Ugh! I'm _cold_!" Fuu shouted to the sky. As though on cue, she felt it. The sneeze. Followed by the third deep sniff. Mugen yelled a groan.

"Oh. My. GOD!" he complained, "Stop _doing_ that!" And just like that, neither of them had to worry about the other telling their third party about what had happened. They had both forgotten.


End file.
